One 3-year-old asked his mom why girls peed out of their butts instead of their dinkles. He seemed bewildered by the lack of comparable enthusiasm by those same adults seated nearby!” The next morning, my 3-year-old stood and peed on the living room floor. We were surrounded by friends and family who cheered as my newborn peed a nice arc in the air.
“When my second son was born in my mother’s spacious bathroom, I sat on the heated tile floor, holding him in my arms. When we told him she didn’t have one, he said, ‘That’s OK, she’ll grow one when she gets bigger.’”Ī mother of two adult sons shared her eldest son’s humorous misunderstanding about peeing on the floor. “When our daughter was born, her older brother inquired about why she didn’t have a penis. One mom realized her son thought everyone had a penis - or at least needed one. “We were headed to San Diego, and I had to tell my son, who was wrist-deep in his own shorts, that sort of thing is totally OK in the privacy of his own bedroom but isn’t appropriate for public display.” My sister and brother-in-law have no idea where that came from!”Ī mother of a now fully grown, adult son laughed while sharing her fond memory of his public masturbation on an Amtrak train.
“He said his ‘hot dog’ hides in the bath when the water gets cold. “He stared at his penis and proudly told me, ‘Look, Ma! He’s dancin’!’”Īn aunt and mother shared the time she heard her nephew refer to his privates as a ballpark favorite. All fears were cast aside when her son announced, “Mommy! My penis feels great!”Ī mom of two remembered the time her young son thought his penis was doing performance art. She remembers the first time he used the proper word for his genitalia while sitting in the tub, pulling and stretching himself so vigorously she worried he might seriously do some damage. She finally calmed down and realized warm, soapy water would solve their sticky problem quickly and painlessly (even though her husband was already on his way home to save his son’s manhood).Ī first-time mommy diligently taught her then-1-year-old the correct terminology for his body, including his boy parts. Upset, she called her husband, who had absolutely no chill either. She was completely freaked out, which caused him to also panic. One mom of two recalled how her 3-year-old, wanting to decorate his penis, wrapped a Jake and the Neverland Pirates Band-Aid around it. His response: “But Mom, I want to pee on everything!” She’d just dressed her little one and turned around to talk to me, when he peeled off his clothes and started urinating on the front lawn. These 10 hilarious stories prove every boy is the king of his own penis party.Ī mom of three shared that her youngest son, just a tad over 2, had recently discovered the joys of being a nudist - along with his ability to water the plants with his penis.
(They also tend to be completely confused when you explain that not everyone has one.)įor every mom who wonders if her son is the only one obsessed with his genitalia, never fear. They will grab, pull and point out their private parts in public with the greatest of enthusiasm. Sacrilegious or not, it was hilarious.Īny parent can attest that when a little boy discovers he has a penis, all social norms go out the door. So did everyone else sitting within earshot of our family. He was standing on the seat beside me, pointing to his newfound erection, and I couldn’t help but laugh.